Demystifying Healthy Boundaries at Work
The COVID 19 pandemic changed the priorities of folks all over the world in terms of considering what matters, and what their non-negotiables are in a professional environment. An increasing number of working professionals are seeking more than just a paycheck, they are looking for autonomy and respect. They are looking for something that’s feeling increasingly mythological as time passes- Healthy boundaries at work.
Old paradigm ideologies of hierarchy, control, and exploitation don’t have to be how we conduct business. We can do better, and fortunately, many of us are demanding better because if we do not create boundaries around our capacity to produce, we will put our individual and collective health and well-being at risk.
An increasing number of workers are beginning to understand that grind culture, and the variety of oppressions that perpetuate it, leave most of us feeling dissatisfied, frustrated, and wanting more. In 2021, Kevin Rousee wrote a New York Times article called, “ Welcome to the YOLO Economy.” The article starts with the following:
“Something strange is happening to exhausted millennial workers in America. After a year spent hunched over on their Macbooks, and during back to back zoom sessions. They are flipping through the carefully arranged chessboards of their lives and deciding to risk it all...I started hearing these stories this year, when several acquaintances announced that they were quitting prestigious and high paying jobs, to pursue passion projects.” As we lean into new paradigms and create alternative organizing structures, we will need to teach ourselves how to enforce healthy boundaries in order for us to feel more free.
“Boundaries are the distance at which I can love you and me simultaneously.”
-Prentis Hemphill
Many folks are immersed in grind culture, engaging in overscheduling meetings, working for long periods of time with no breaks, and feeling guilty for resting. All of these symptoms of grind culture reflect a lack of healthy professional boundaries. Having healthy boundaries is important because they do the following:
They Define your Identity: Healthy boundaries help you to understand and assert what you like and what you don’t like. They respect your preferences.
They Protect your Time: Healthy boundaries help you to save time for yourself so you can pour back into you. As the saying goes: “You can’t pour from an empty cup.”
They Bring Order: Healthy boundaries bring clarity around job responsibilities, work load, time commitment and capacity, as well as firm start and end times.
They Cultivate Respect: When you define yourself for yourself, you are able to model for others what acceptable treatment looks like with you in daily interactions. When you respect your time, then others will be more likely to respect it as well.
They Preserve your Purpose and Mission: When you have healthy boundaries, you reclaim your time and find ways to refuel and restore your spirit.
As a recovering people pleaser, maintaining and communicating my boundaries continues to be difficult work. however, now I know that in the moments when I lose balance and get immersed in patterns of codependency, I can return back to center by incorporating the following principles.
Strategies for Exercising Healthy Boundaries
Check in with your personal boundaries Get really clear on what your preferences are and what conditions are the most affirming and uplifting to your spirit.
Communicate Assertively Its time to stop apologizing for when you are unavailable. Replaced phrases like “Sorry for the delay!” to “I appreciate your patience.” Refocus your priority on being respected as opposed to well-liked. Eeek! This is a hard one.
3. Create structures of transparency. Get clear details on when you are expected to work and what was in my job description and what was not in my job description. I ensured that my team worked towards a tracking system that measured the time and capacity of my staff for equitable division of labor.
4. Delegate, delegate, delegate. Instead of immediately rushing to pick up extra work to look like the ultimate team player, delegate your work in equitable ways. Become comfortable with naming what is and what is not in your bandwidth.
5. Own your yeses and no's Instead of always being a “yes” person, ad over scheduling yourself, own your yeses and your no’s. Get used to saying “no” to a lot more opportunities to make way for the yeses so you can dive deep into purpose and passion.
If you are interested in incorporating healthy boundaries at work but are not sure how, consider downloading this Healthy Boundaries Action Plan that I created.
I would also suggest reading Set Boundaries, Find Peace as a way to operationalize setting healthy boundaries at work and in your personal life. Sometimes the word “no” is a necessary form of medicine.
Heather Archer is an author, workplace wellness coach, sound healer, and hypnotherapy practitioner who helps others heal their relationship with grind culture and toxic productivity through coaching, workshops, and retreats. Learn more at www.thrivingwithheather.com.